CONFUSION =l

i hate this thought of mine --CONFUSION..

i don't know if i love him but i wanted to be with him especially when i see him..
i wanted to be with him,for us to be together again..
i can feel that he wanted it too but he's stopping his self for a reason..
i don't know what's his reason..
it's really an unending love story..

i hate it when he stares at me..
when he smiles at me..
when he cares for me..
when he touch my hand..
when he get mad at me..
when he whisper my name..
when he says i love you..
when he kiss me..
when his actions makes me more to be with him..
(coz after that i feel empty..)

i can't even say his mine,we separate ways and don't know if there's a probability of being together.. though some people show caressed for me still i'm longing for him.. i don't know what's that something with him that makes me even wanted him more, i hate it but that's for real.. my heart breaks into pieces when he show that i'm not that important to him, i wanna breakdown.. and easily get jealous when i see his comforting other persons and i'm left behind..
people around us wanted to see us together, but when will that time come again?
i'm wishing that we can be together, no matter what the gap will be i'll ensure to him that i will be strong and fight for him when that time comes.. fight for him come what may.. be with me again.. then i'll be the one to serenade you and say that "i'll be the greatest fan of your life..."

ESPECIALLY FOR YOU =)

This letter is especially for you. .I MEAN IT =)

To My Everdearest Ching,

Today is a special day for you, another year older.. (katwa muna.. hehe) I may not be a part of your special day today but surely you will and always be a big part of my life..(naks..that's true..And i wish on my birthday you'll be there.. Your presence would be a beautiful gift then.. =)
I wish you all the best that this world may offer to you - happiness, health,wealth,friendship,love&peace of mind.. I can see that many people love you simply the way you are.. Hope you won't change and remained kind-hearted..

Thank you for for spending your life with me even for a while and I'm telling you know how happy I am knowing someone like you.. I have no regrets when i fell in love with you.. A MEMOIR, the memories that we had will always remained here inside my heart..

Sorry if somehow I hurt you, (time out kapampangan para aabsorb me lalu..haha)
sorry last time when i've said

"ali cge bahala naku keng sarili ku, ika din bahala naka keng sarili mu.."

It was unintentionally, i didn't mean to say it pero ita mu kasi akakit kung way para enaka maguluhan and mkpgmove on naka with your life.. Kung buryanan kumu talaga buri ku akayabe dakapang malwat neng balu tanaman diba.. Kaya siguro mas masanting na makanta meging disisyun.. Ekuman asabing harapan keka kaya apin namu ini ing way para asabi ku keka ini.. Pasensiya na neh, sana maging close tapa rin kahit makananu.. Remember nyang mgseatmate tamu lagi, the thing na eku kalingwan keka is pag magclass pag mgknta ku tas mgknta ka rin.. and the song stuck in my mind was "RUNAWAY" madalas ke kasi kknta ta dba tas kanta me din.. Pati pag pasulat ka kanaku, and kakulitan mu makamiss.. Promise ku cge enaku mgmasungit keka.. Sorry pag apapagsungitan dka balu mu naman eku buri ta pero tabalu it just happen eh.. Egana-ganang pepakit ku keka tutu ngan ta.. Hopefully you are able to appreciate every little thing that we've shared.. No need to mention kasi every moment i've spent with you was really MEMORABLE.. alakung augse kahit pag mipate, away-bati, egana-gana.. Through the good and bad times still alakung hard feelings keka kaya ali naka pa-sorry ok? Everything happen for a reason, we were accidentally in love with each other for a while and worth it nman ta.. We've learned, and we've learned.. haha.. alanakung balung ituglung kanu kasi.. hehe.. Though we're apart you're in my heart, haha.. mgkanta kumu.. ali sana pin ita kahit ala communication talaga sana mkpgTwitter tamu.. haha.. para atleast updated.. kahit alang love atleast friendship remains..
Sana din akayabe dka mgcooking lesson someday.. haha.. Tin ca pa din utang kakung singing and dancing..haha =)

Wishing you a happy merry birthday and FORGET ME NOT,ok? =)
I wanna see you smiling always.. OK?
And if tin prob. asahan mu you can count me on..
Kahit buhay pag-ibig yapa yan i won't hesitate to help you, just tell me.. (ali mu financially,haha)
SPECIAL ka kaku, always remember that..
And it won't change..
Oh keni namu neh.. sana eka magtampu nung edka agad greet..
Buri ku kasi aku last mgGreet keka, para at the end of the day aisip muku din..
haha.. Pa-importanti kanu neh.. Oitah muh..

"Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find that what you're looking for has been here the whole time.. If you could see that I'm the one who understands you, been here all along.. Have you ever thought just maybe.. YOU BELONG WITH ME ^^."
=>someday it gonna makes sense.. =)

May God showers you with His continous blessings..
SHUNEI SHUNREI KUALE CHING.. (Ühugs&kissesÜ)

Tons of love,
Stitch (Angel) Ü

i i i..

i just feel like writing more and more..
my only way to ease the pain..
i need no one to make this burdens Lesser..

hay sana nga may magsabi sa akin ng..

"ANG TANGA MO, ANG TANGA TANGA MO TALAGA!!"

hay namiss ko yun, sana nman..
pero paano nila ssbhin un kaw lang nakakabasa nito aking blogs.
haha..
ang tanga ko tlaga..gusto pa manggaling sa iba.
naku.. hay cge sleep nalang ako..

=(

please, no farewell =(

it makes me weak..
it hurts..
this day it do hurts..
i dunno,maybe coz i felt ignored by him today..

i wanted to keep the closeness between the two of us..
i'm not ignoring you..
sorry for my stupidity..
i know it must not go on this way..
but..

oh my dear just wanna say sorry..

so if your asking me if i wanted you stay?
my answer would be a big YES!!
stay.. please =(

"I DON'T HAVE THE STRENGTH TO STAY AWAY FROM YOU"
"I WANT YOU ALWAYS, AND I'M DYING WHEN I'M GETTING CLOSER TO YOU"
"I'M UNCONDITIONALLY AND IRREVOCABLY IN LOVE WITH YOU"

damn! it sucks! hate this thoughts of mine..
but this way, my only way to burst it out..

BUT.. =(

i wanted to be near you..
stay beside you..
but..

hoping we can be the same old us..
wishing someday we can laugh again together..
sing.dance.reminisce.

but..

can i bid goodbye for a while?
maybe a year can do..
after a year then we can't be together..
it's ok, but still i try.. try to be stupid..

i don't care about others what i care for is my decisions..
decisions to make this love worthwhile though i'm bearing the pain all alone..
mind me not.. just go on with your life..
i don't want you to think about me.. OK? Ü

(HOPEFULLY YOU'LL BE ABLE TO READ THIS STUFF.)

"KATANGAHAN"
-make sense, right? =)

regrets..

this day was full of regrets (12-05-09)
if only i do this, did that..
but what can i do.. it's over..

but though it was a regret day for me still i had some reasons to make my day worthwhile..
i miss my cousins so much but unluckily we can't be that happy this xmas..=(
if only we can turn back the time..
problems.problems..

my work.. sshhhh.. i'm not done =(

my decisions? whoa..

him? i dunno..

full of hesitations..
can't come up with my own decisions..
i wanted to be more independent..
to have self-esteem..

but all i wanna do right now is to scream out loud and cry =(

WEAK?? i'm not..
perhaps, maybe..

this stuff is non-sense..
i can't think of thoughts that i would wanted to write..

=(

tears in my eyes..

hatin' this thoughts that tears were about to fall..
there not beyond my control but..
i dunno.. haha..
can't i change for a while?
how i'd wish i can..
change my stupidity..

(oita,mbarkada naku pala.. haha..
i'll talked to you later my blogs..
bye2 na, late na ako punta pa ng capitol,
have my work and that's it..
work.school.myself.family.friends.GOD♥
maybe that's the thing i should be focus now..
isn't? haha..maloloka na ako..
sagutin mq my blogs..hehe
ingat ako?salamat..haha )